Food in Mouth

lancaster-okonomiyaki

I remember the last time spicy food made my butthole burn

It's hard not to remember a ramen that made your butthole burn. I mean this in the best way possible. In fact between my mouth being on fire from eating the spicy red chili ramen from Ivan Ramen until when it burned through the hole where the sun don't shine was only six hours. Before we talk more about how a tasty delicious ramen turned my bung hole into Mount Vesuvius, let's talk about other aspects of Ivan Ramen. The first thing is that a line forms outside of the Lower East Side restaurant prior to their dinner hours starting. And if can snatch one while the weather is good, sit out in their back yard area. It's super nice.

triple-pork-garlic

In addition to the ramen we tried the Lancaster Okonomiyaki, which the menu listed as scrapple waffle, charred cabbage, pickled apple, and maple kewpie (mayo). I've read some reviews that said the waffle could be more crisp. And sure it's not a potato chip, but the dish as a whole was completely pleasant, perhaps owning to the fact that the mayo has delicious delicious MSG in it. Mmm...

Steph ordered the triple pork, triple garlic mazemen. It has tonkatsu broth, pork chasu, whole wheat noodle and some bits of bacon. Mazemen is the perfect kind of ramen for the summer because you're not sweating from slurping up a whole bowl of hot broth. Compared to ass burniness of my ramen, the triple pork, triple garlic was way more balanced in terms of flavor. I think next time that's what I would order instead.

spicy-red-chili-ramen

But man, the spicy red chili ramen at Ivan Ramen... it's almost as if Ivan Orkin was in some food television throwdown and was determined to make a ramen that would be spicier than any other in New York. The ramen has some ground pork in it and a smashed egg. With all the bits floating around in the broth, it was more like a red lava slurry than a soupy broth. And yea, any time something only takes six hours to from from mouth to ass (don't go the other way kids), you know that thing is just like a JJ Watt blind side blitz on a quarterback. It hits ya hard. It's entirely possible because I'm getting older that my digestive system is a sissy that can't take a hit, but goddamn.

Ivan Ramen
25 Clinton St.
New York, NY 10002
646-678-3859

Map to find Ivan Ramen

Posted by Danny on

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Comments

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  • I wish you did some fact checking. Ivan Ramen does NOT use MSG.

  • @Michael,

    uh, kewpie mayo has msg in it? y'all put that on the description. what, you guys made your own? and then didn't add msg and then called it by the name brand? i'm confused.

  • @Michael -- yeah, Danny's logic is sound. Kewpie mayo is a trademarked type of condiment that (for better or worse) notoriously contains MSG. Thus Ivan using a condiment that contains MSG = Ivan uses MSG. That isn't to say that MSG is added to the ramen itself, which doesn't seem to be the case, but only that if any restaurant is using Kewpie mayo, it is using a condiment that contains MSG.

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