Betting on a diet
My body is a machine. It's not a Ducati or anything like that. A more apropos comparison would be to Hyundai, before they got all cool and made the quality better. The reason for the comparison is because I calculated my BMI. At 5 foot and 8 inches tall, weighing in most recently at 182 pounds, my BMI is 27.7. This puts me squarely in the 'Overweight' bracket. Calculations also show that I'm around 20 pounds from normal and 20 pounds from obese. Jesus. The most that I have ever weighed was 183 and that was in year one of this little blog. In college I was mostly around 160 to 165 pounds. And even at 165, that puts me at a BMI of 25.1. Of course by now most people know that BMI is very inaccurate in determining your health since it treats the weight of fat the same as weight of muscle. Think about it, 200 pounds of fat is insane and 200 pounds of muscle turns you into a linebacker in the NFL. I think it's time to start losing weight. Before reading more of this post, I have to strongly warn you that the next picture is graphic and it's a picture of my belly pouch. It's not a pouch of love like a pregnant mother carries, instead it's a pouch representing foods that I love too much. Now that you've had your warning, if you want to read more, go ahead. Last chance to bounce though. It ain't pretty.
Damn. Fuck. Holy motherfucker. What is that?! See normally I don't look at myself in the mirror. The one in the bathroom isn't long enough, so usually I just see the top half of my body. As you can see, I have two images of NBA basketballs as nipples. This is because I'm an alien. But even as an alien, it's just not possible to eat everything in sight and not see consequences. The only way for long term consistent weight management is to exercise regularly. This is especially true for a person like myself who can down cookies like there's no tomorrow.
For healthy weight loss, experts say you shouldn't aim for more than one pound a week. One pound is 3500 calories. This means burning an additional 500 calories a day than what your body normally burns. Your body needs at least 10 calories per pound of weight to kind of sustain itself without going into reserve fuel. So at 182 pounds, that's over 1800 calories. Most individuals would probably feel hungry at 10 calories per pound. The upper limit is around 15 calories per pound. So if I pick a nice number of 13 calories per pound, times 180 pounds, we arrive at 2300 calories a day of possible consumption. And then burning 500 calories off of that EVERY DAY until we arrive at the target weight of 160. This also sets the weigh loss goal at 1 pound a week, which is healthy and doable.
So the goal is to hit 160 when June 1st rolls around. The short term goal is to not gain weight from week to week. If I don't reach the goal, I'm going to donate $500 dollars to the George Bush Presidential Library Fund. I think it's no secret how much I despise the policies of Bush so there's no way in hell I want to give my money to that doucheface. Anyway, let the dieting begin.
(I invite you to follow me on Twitter so you can get more of my non-sense in another medium.)
Wow, posting that shot took guts, literally.
FN
January 14, 2011 4:58 pm
I'm with you my friend. It's time to loos some pounds. I'll make a pact with you if you like. You are my hero.
Jonathan
January 14, 2011 5:30 pm
ugh I knew I shouldn't have clicked on this entry. At least I don't feel so bad for being 175 now.
I'll graciously volunteer to hold the $500 for you. If you hit 160, I'll give it back. Otherwise I'll make the donation in your name.
Either that or we should have a bet. I need some extra motivation to lose the fat as well.
Patrick
January 14, 2011 9:32 pm
Just wanted to say mad props to you sir. It's all too easy to eat stuff in excess because everything's fucking delicious, but to hold yourself to the weight loss all while doubling as a food blogger gets a world of respect in my book.
++ mad brave for posting pics. I guess it keeps you accountable, but I was too embarrassed to post my fat shirtless pics even after losing weight, I was annoyed I even let myself get that far.
TL;DR - GO DANNY!
Nicholas
January 14, 2011 10:46 pm
OMG, your pic seriously cracked me up. And not saying you have man boobs, but showed the pic to my BF, and he asked if that pic was of you and your GF! Anyway, good luck to you. I lost 10 lbs of cupcake and pasta weight 3 years ago by jogging. Jogging sucks ass, but it seems 2 work.
bionicgrrrl
January 17, 2011 11:51 am
how did you go from being muscled and toned to being buddha? start watching exercise videos on that giant ass tv of yours.
Ang
January 17, 2011 7:09 pm
@FN,
haha, yes took some guts there.
@Jonathan,
Let's make a pact. When we go see jack, let's be ten pounds less (at least). I'm supposed to be like at 165 around that time.
@Patrick,
Let's have a fat bet. Loser buys winner popeyes. haha. For you 10% weight loss would take you to 158. When's the last time you were 158?
@Nicholas,
Thank you good sir. Yea, it's totally tough to have all this delicious food staring at ya in the face and then realize it can't all be eaten. I should try the Charles Barkley diet. He said if it tastes good, he spits it out. haha
@Bionicgrrrl,
haha, yo these man boobies are gravity defying. They're awesome.
@Ang,
haha, exercise videos are so lame though. Billy Blanks? No thanks. ESPN is more like it. Good thing there's TV at the gym.
Danny
January 18, 2011 10:58 am
Even though I didn't/shouldn't have scrolled down, its like watching a train wreck. You just have to. haha. Anyway, good luck.
Jack
January 18, 2011 6:33 pm
Please don't be offended when I say I literally lol'd after clicking into reading more... Hahaha!! Your writing adds to the hilarity. Major respect points. I want to avoid saying 'good luck' because I honestly feel you got this. SHABBA!
Kimberly
February 18, 2011 2:06 am